Blog | Dwayne Perkins

Icing Like Tyson

by dwayneperkins | Feb 2, 2011 | Funny Editorials, Funny True Stories, New York I Love You

For a boxer, being bequeathed a nickname is a sure fire sign that you’ve arrived on the boxing scene. If Mac “The Killer” Jones is fighting Ralph Henderson, “The Killer” has to be the prefight favorite. A sure fire sign that you have completely permeated pop culture...

Broke Down Communication

by dwayneperkins | Feb 1, 2011 | Funny Editorials, Funny True Stories, World Travels

I think there’s some benefit to wearing sunglasses all the time. Sure you’re “that guy” and you lose out on some quality interactions with people who’ll have none of your pretentiousness. On the flip side though, you avoid uncomfortable exchanges. I don’t wear...

“Jeopardy” in Jeopardy

by dwayneperkins | Jan 27, 2011 | Funny Editorials, Funny Technology Essays

I’m told a super computer called Watson will soon be a contestant on Jeopardy. “I’ll take signs the machines are taking over for a thousand, Alex.” Does this feel like the beginning of a Sci-Fi movie with a very unhappy ending to anyone else? I’m sure the...

A Stone’s Throw

by dwayneperkins | Jan 12, 2011 | Funny Technology Essays, Funny True Stories, World Travels

They say people in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones but I say they can as long as they open a window first. Run your hands over your glass dwelling until you find your window. Your “window” is a small hole in your translucent igloo that makes you different than...

What’s My Queue

by dwayneperkins | Jan 3, 2011 | Funny Editorials, Funny True Stories, Living In Los Angeles, New York I Love You, World Travels

If patience is a virtue, nothing offers more opportunity to get your virtue on than standing in line. Be it the post office, airport, bank or butcher*; it just seems like people being serviced at the window judge the quality of the experience by how long they get to...

Pickey Picker

by dwayneperkins | Dec 28, 2010 | Funny True Stories, Living In Los Angeles

I was recently eating pho soup in LA’s most hip, Vietnamese restaurant. Want proof? The restaurant doesn’t have its name displayed on the outside, just a blank white board where one would expect the name to be. I’m sure this is a tactical move by the proprietors. ...

Still Ballin’

by dwayneperkins | Dec 22, 2010 | Funny Short Inspirational Stories, Funny True Stories, World Travels

So I’m watching TV in my hotel room in Tel Aviv at 3am. If jet lag is indigestion, staying up past 2am on your 1st night in a time zone 10 hours ahead of yours is like eating a chili dog to fix it. There was no need to exacerbate matters; I was sleepy so I thought I...

Hebrew Haha

by dwayneperkins | Dec 13, 2010 | Funny True Stories, World Travels

So I met up with a friend of mine who’s an Israeli Stand-up Comic. I went to check out his all-Hebrew show. Watching Stand-up in a language you don’t understand is a neat experiment, especially as a stand-up. I found myself trying to decipher the jokes by tone and...

Get ‘er Done…Incrementally

by dwayneperkins | Dec 2, 2010 | Funny Editorials, Funny Short Inspirational Stories

Today, a friend sent me an article about a calendar system that Jerry Seinfeld used or perhaps uses to write jokes and was kind enough to share with other comics. It was sent to me because it reminded my friend of my intricate weekly activity system I have shared...

Balance Is Key

by dwayneperkins | Nov 19, 2010 | Funny Short Inspirational Stories, Funny True Stories, World Travels

I stood on the District line train in London’s Underground ready to disembark, not holding on to anything, applying lotion and lip balm as the train pulled into Victoria. I finished up my beauty regimen as the train jerked to a stop and was taken back to my childhood...

Dwayne Perkins