by dwayneperkins | Apr 30, 2008 | Uncategorized
Earlier this year, I was at my local gym on a gorgeous Los Angeles day. This was the kind of day you call your friends and family back east and brag about.LA BRAGGER: You shoveled snow today? That’s too bad. It’s picture perfect here. I’m in shorts and a tank top and...
by dwayneperkins | Apr 28, 2008 | Uncategorized
You can file this under “Only in LA.” I recently saw a woman wearing all pink at a commercial audition. (We weren’t going in for the same part) Everything was pink: her outfit, accessories and even her dog. Yes, she had a Pink dog. My uncanny ability to ease drop on...
by dwayneperkins | Apr 11, 2008 | Uncategorized
Last week I saw a guy in Starbucks in LA, a normal trucker looking guy with a beard, gray shirt and jeans on. What’s so odd about that you ask? Well, on top of what I already described this guy also had on a long brown wig and he had boobs. Is he butch or just the...
by dwayneperkins | Mar 28, 2008 | Uncategorized
My friend recently called me up in arms saying that the 99cents* store had gone up in price. Turns out what my friend the alarmist was referring to was a few items that used to be 2 for $.99 now cost 59 cents each. I didn’t have the heart or energy to point out to my...
by dwayneperkins | Mar 11, 2008 | Uncategorized
Most people only ”go” away from home only if they are in a dire situation. I on the other hand prefer “going” away from home. I only need moderate cleanliness and I’m good. And by moderate I mean nothing alive or moving.I see the downside of not controlling the...
by dwayneperkins | Feb 11, 2008 | Uncategorized
I performed in Salt Lake City, Utah last weekend.* The state is 50% Mormon. You may be familiar with Mormonism from those feel-good, do the right thing, love thy neighbor commercials back in the eighties and nineties…”He told the truth..I told the...
by dwayneperkins | Jan 28, 2008 | Uncategorized
Last night I decided to go through the Jack in the Box drive-thru. I really just wanted one $1 chicken sandwich to take the edge off. (just something to hold me over until I got home, where a can of Target Chicken Noodle soup was screaming my name. Yes they sell...
by dwayneperkins | Nov 21, 2007 | Uncategorized
But remember brothers and sisters you can still stand tall.*There’s so much to be thankful for, even if you don’t get down with the silly Pilgrim/Indian angle. PILGRIM: Enjoy your Turkey Chief Running Out Of Time…It might be your last.Still though, minus the Turkey...
by dwayneperkins | Nov 8, 2007 | Uncategorized
I don’t want to hear any Los Angeles city official say they don’t have money for schools when they have clearly spent millions installing holograms above every freeway overpass. This is why you look up at the freeway and see traffic moving smoothly then you hop on and...
by dwayneperkins | Oct 23, 2007 | Uncategorized
It’s October 22 in New York City and Non-White people are wearing shorts. When will it be okay for Al Gore to say “I told you so”? New Yorkers seem to love the unseasonably warm weather. Even though if Global Warming keeps up at this pace science...
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Hot Chocolate For The Mind
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Dwayne Perkins To The Rescue
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She Ate My Haircut