Saber Tooth (Funny Blog from Comedy Central’s Dwayne Perkins)

The other day I walked into a bar/restaurant to meet some friends. On my way to my friends’ table I ran into another friend. I made a slight detour and stopped to chat for a sec with the friend I had bumped into. As we chatted some of her friends arrived. Introductions were made and I said hi to the new comers. I shook each of their hands and repeated each of their names. As I started to excuse myself (remember, I still had my original friends waiting) a girl I had just met from my detour table said to me

NEW GIRL: I don’t want to interrupt your phone call!

Huh? Then I realized I had my Bluetooth still on. I had parked my car minutes before and I forgot that I still had it on. So then I said…

ME: I’m sorry but I’m not on the phone. I just got out of my car and–

NEW GIRL: Right…Well when I get out of my car I take off my sunglasses…

Huh? I’m not capturing her tone here. She was implying that I was being all “Hollywood”. I let the first dig go but the second one was totally uncalled for. I don’t think one forgotten Bluetooth leave-in is enough to be labeled rude or “Hollywood”.

I was about to explain to her that as it what night time, to leave your shades on would be a much graver offense. Mainly because to leave shades on at night, a person would be actively choosing blindness to pull of a look. I on the other hand forgot I had the stupid Bluetooth, which I’m mandated by the state to wear when I’m driving and talking, on.

I was about to say something but I spotted my original friends and joined them. Her words lingered a bit and the first 3 bites of my Chicken Fried Rice weren’t as enjoyable as they could have been. The fourth bite was delish! Shoulder cleaned…and dirt removed.

QSN: The Formosa café in Hollywood is a bar that serves Chinese food… Amazing right?!

Later on I shared the story with my Ace Boon Coon (aka homeboy.) He was convinced that the girl actually liked me and was trying to get my attention. Huh? She had my attention. It made perfect sense after I thought about it. My detour table had a bunch of stand-up comics that I didn’t know, so maybe there was hierarchy tension I didn’t notice. Also, the New Girl’s dig came after I announced that I would have to go to my original destination table. Was that her sarcastic last ditch effort to get me to stay and banter?

Whatever the case, I didn’t speak to that girl again for the rest of the night. Even on my way out I said goodbye to detour table but not to her directly. What are your thoughts?

It seems the world over seeks attention. It’s almost the real currency and money is just a symptom of attention. My inadvertent Bluetooth leave-in maybe sent a signal to detour table that I thought I was more important or that I wasn’t going to pay full attention to them. That I was a click away to bigger, better more important voices coming into my right ear.

It didn’t mean that but funny how New Girl taking it that way caused her to be actually ruder than my Bluetooth leave-in suggests I may have been.

QSN = Quick Side Note

2 thoughts on “Saber Tooth (Funny Blog from Comedy Central’s Dwayne Perkins)

  1. me!

    Comment three-fer. (Buy in bulk and save!)

    1) Saber Tooth

    Don't sweat the stuff that's in other people's heads.

    2) Carson Daly

    Cool! Congrats on the unexpected airtime.

    3) Email/Records/Freedom

    Don't sweat the stuff that's in other people's heads.

  2. jhiro

    It's hard to say without seeing her face or hearing her tone. If she was smiling in a friendly or sly way, I'd guess she was teasing to flirt or just for fun. If she looked serious or had a superior attitude she's just aggressive at calling others out on stuff and probably has issues. She used to get picked on a lot by Bluetooth people.

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