California’s Venice Beach has become so overrun with guys selling their home made music CDs that I’m now contemplating wearing my own gaudy over sized headphones when I go there so I look like I’m selling my CD as well. It’s like the night of the living dead out there except all the Zombies are trying to score music deals. And how do you stop a Zombie from attacking? You pass yourself off as a Zombie of course.

Venice Beach is like walking in Myspace. Like a movie where you’re watching your computer screen one minute and the next minute you’re in it dodging bands’ friend requests, occasionally gawking a tad too long at plump girls wearing outfits 3 sizes too small, and staying clear of weirdos selling things and/or ideologies lest you catch a virus.

And much like Myspace these indie musicians are making Venice Beach unbearable for me. And much like myspace the scantily clad women are making Venice beach undesirable for women who like wearing outfits that fit and leave something to the imagination. Personally, the jury is still out on whether skimpy outfits in fact stunts or enhances my imagination. Be it virtual or real, I brave the skin show with the non-judgmental, inclusive spirit I was taught as a kid…well, with that and a pair of binoculars.

Imagine my surprise when I bumped into a music Zombie far far away in a Coffee shop in Studio City. But the Zombies aren’t supposed to live long enough to make it here to the San Fernando valley. Have they mutated? They have my friends, a mother daughter team selling the little girl’s demo CD door to door. They caught me sitting down at LuLu’s beehive completely off guard and immobile. I caved. And I have the song “Me and My Puppy” in my music library as proof of my slippage. That and 5 dollars less in my wallet.

Shall I burn it for you? That’ll be five dollars!…Run for your lives.